The boys and I took a road trip to Long Island to see my mom. For the first time driving with then was less managing them in the car and more like a real road trip adventure that we were taking together. On the way they wanted to listen to music. I let them choose the music. Of course, they made me listen to both Thorazine albums all the way through before we moved on to other music. We all sang along because after being at so many rehearsals they know the words and the back up parts. They had questions about what songs we wrote first and what songs we wrote later. It was really fun. After the end of Vicious Cycle, Ryan grabbed my arm and said Mom, I have to tell you how proud I am of you and Dad. You guys are in a really cool band and I am so glad you are doing this again. I see how much you both like to do this and I am glad you guys are my parents. It meant a ton to me to know he is proud of what we do. In that moment I wanted him to stay exactly the way he is and on the cusp of eleven forever.
Aaron loves Long Island. He adores my sister and my mother. All he talks about is moving to Long Island. I find that so funny. I fought so hard to get off Long Island and all Aaron wants to do is move back. He loves that my mother had a rabbit in her backyard that likes to sun himself in the afternoon. He loves the old women who make a fuss over him at the retirement community. He loves that the local restaurant wants to feed him safely. He tells me that he loves the nature on Long Island and he hopes to grow up and live in suburbia one day. I told him he was welcome to live wherever he wanted as he grows up. I don’t get it but then again he wants to grow up to be a miner.
As we waited for the children’s hours to begin at the pool of the retirement community where my mother lives, my mom and I sat on her porch. The houses all were built around the time I was born but they are all immaculately kept with lovely lawns, perfect landscaping, and really clean cars. My mother said the people across the way were new to the neighborhood and they just moved in. The man was 53, the wife, 46, and their kids had gone off to college. I bristled, your neighbor is younger than I am and I took a deep swallow. I faced myself and thought, I could move into a retirement community, and it made me feel a little sick. I am so not ready to move to the land of rules about the rules and retired folks playing board and card games every night in the club house. Where everyone had way too much time on their hands and they want to spent time talking about everyone else. Later that night I called home and told my husband, who will be 50 next month, about the neighbors. He was all HELL NO. I never want to live somewhere with just one generation of people. Jo, we are far from ready for a place like that, we are not that slow. We are busy and still have years of adventures ahead of us. I was so glad to talk to him and I felt so relieved.