Today was the last of the Friday Mom’s Day Off for twelve long long weeks. That is the one part of summer that makes me pause.

Don’t get me wrong, I love summer.  I love the idea of no homework, for both kids, for three long months.  I love the idea of coming up with schemes and things to do with our day. I really don’t like that I have to budget in the money for sitters so I can sleep.  Don’t get me wrong I love ALL of my sitters.  Summer is hard.  I make less because my bar is significantly slower in the summer and pay out more for time to sleep with babysitters.  That is the only part of summer that gets tough.

I started the online summer school this week with the boys so they could get used to the interface and the idea of “homeschool summer school”.  They love it.  Aaron walked in the house from after school program today at 5:30pm and the first thing he asked to do was summer school!  The cartoons are cute and the drills are fun.  I don’t see this being something hard to coax them to do.

Wednesday my baby graduates from Kindergarten.  I am really trying to wrap my head around it.  My baby, well my youngest born who insists he is a baby, is quickly becoming a big kid.  On Monday they are going to celebrate his birthday a month early at school.  He is going to be the big seven.  Graduating kindergarten and birthday celebrations, oh my, a ton to wrap my head around.  Ryan’s class has an award ceremony on Thursday.

One more milestone on this Friday evening, this is the first weekend since October that I can announce that Ryan has no GODDAMN MOTHERFUCKING homework this weekend.  I think they plan to give little homework this week since it is the last four days of school.  I know personally, I am ready to recover from our version of homework hell this year and look onwards.

I look forward to wearing out my kids everyday till they collapse is a sun screen smelling pile of exhaustion,  I also looking forward to piling in my bed with them after a long day, a shower, and letting them read to me. This summer is full of hope and promise.

I worry.  The summer of 2010 both kids were in the hospital twice for emergencies, my father had two long hospital stays four hours away, then died, my husband changed jobs, and we were in epilepsy hell after missing my fathers funeral, with drugs that left my kid a shell of himself.  Summer 2011 Ryan would up admitted to the hospital after developing an allergy to his epilepsy drug and Aaron had surgery.  I had a psychotic Ryan by the end of the summer who was seeing and hearing things that were not there after an “on the fly” epilepsy med change.  Luckily, our neurologist decided to see what happened to Ryan off drugs and I am happy to report no seizures.

I am using every ounce of my being to will this summer to be better.  A rebuilding.  Ryan is going to go to Occupational Therapy, Physical Therapy, and Behavioral Therapy this summer.  I am still researching Social Groups for Ryan.  I plan to spend time with Aaron helping him to know how important he is.  We will have fun, hell or high water!!