Step one - It was determined that Ryan in fact shoved the kid who gave him a beat down and I didn’t see it because I was behind them. I am so angry because Ryan lied and I backed him up. I need lessons on when to trust my kid and when not to. The result is I am home with Ryan today because he is suspended. SUSPENDED. Like in that no high schools of any worth will take him in the city because he was suspended. Yeah. That suspended. He is on lock down this weekend. He lost all privileges to go outside with friends until Monday, he is not getting any sweet treats this weekend, and he is not to interact with electronics of any kind. He still swam last night and will swim tonight at swim team. Sunday I plan to take both boys to do laps with me so Ryan has a movement outlet which is vital for him to manage his behavior. I spoke with the dean about the management of the line in the morning. That line has been out of control since LAST year and I am usually one of two parents who waits with their kid to be picked up by the teacher in the morning. We did our best to have the kids under control but they would ignore us. I usually would wind up pulling Ryan out of line to wait with me. I am beyond fed up because this ALL could have been avoided.
Step two – As I was driving to work the developmental pediatricians from CHOP called. They said basically after two test they are still unsure if Ryan is on the Autism Spectrum. They declare we have reason to pursue this diagnosis and that there are many reasons why they think Ryan is on the Autism Spectrum but in other areas he tests not on the Autism Spectrum. They called his case “puzzling” and they want to bring us back in to do more testing with other Doctors. I love Ryan, he can never be typical even in his atypicality.
Step three -. My husband called from swim team. The coach, of course, is not happy about Ryan. (what else is new) He wanted to touch base with us about strategies to help Ryan manage himself. They are not asking him to leave the team but the coach was expecting better behavior from him as he aged. We have decided to not sign Ryan up for the weekend drill camp and instead have him earn it with positive behavior. I want to talk to the coach next week and get him on board with my plan. Ryan and his transition issues usually have a hard time at the beginning of swim season. I remember how hard the first practice and meet were last year but quickly the boys got into a very manageable groove.
Step four - Next week I have a meeting to get Ryan reinstated to school on Monday, Tuesday brings Ryan’s IEP redo because almost everyone did not show up who was supposed to show up at the meeting last week, and Wednesday we have Aaron’s annual allergy testing. Last year just having his allergens on his arm had him asthmatic and vomiting in a garbage can. Oh joy.
By the time I got to work last night I was in tears and feeling like I could not breath. My husband was having trouble managing the kids at swimming and kept calling for advice. My poor co-worker had to take up the slack. I spend time on the phone with another special needs Mom and brainstormed while trying to catch my breath and get my head into the work game and out of the home game. Today I am home with Ryan. I am hoping he lets me sleep some because I have to work tonight but it will be tough with his no electronics restriction. If I don’t sleep I will be working twenty hours on two and a half hours sleep.
Right now, yesterday goes into the books one of the suckiest days in a very very long time.
October 12, 2012 at 7:57 am
Must be something in the air or water. Yesterday was horrid for me as well. But all I had to do was step outside of my self and remember days that sucked far more than that one. There have been many, it seems. It really helps.
October 12, 2012 at 8:03 am
Yeah, knock on wood, no one is in the hospital
October 12, 2012 at 8:57 am
Damn, hon!
Do the CHOP drs know the difference between Autism “proper” and Aspergers? Cuz that’s exactly what I was told when Third Son was in kindergarten and first grade. Then by third grade a new eval gave us Aspergers which totally fits.
Hate to say it but the pre-teen and early teens years are (so far for me) the worst. Hormones plus different expectations (read: transitions) make anxiety skyrocket and behavior degrade. Third Son is now trying ADHD meds. Its supposed to help a lot of Aspie kids maintain focus and calm.
*hugs*
October 12, 2012 at 9:04 am
I saw the boys leaving swimming last night . They were leaving as we were coming in. Did you reconsider the Center for Autism? I wasn’t please with CHOP in that department. I finally got somewhere with The Center For Autism. Maybe they could help you.
October 12, 2012 at 11:52 am
JoAnn, I am so sorry that you guys had a rough day yesterday. I would think about trying the Center for Autism. I have not taken Evan to CHOP, but the Center for Autism did give him an Aspberger’s diagnosis, along with the ADHD that the school dist. had diagnosed him with earlier. Good luck. Call me if you need to vent.
October 12, 2012 at 1:54 pm
That is one crappy day. I hope you managed to sneak in some sleep today, and I agree with the commenters above…if CHOP is still dilly dallying with this, maybe it’s time to see someone who’s a little more decisive?